Why do people insist on talking about their gross ass birthing stories everytime someone has a baby? I get it, you’re excited, someone you kind of like and spend 8 and a half hours a day with had a baby and its cute and wonderful, but 850 people work here and if I have to hear about one more goddamn episiotomy …. I’ll probably just be annoyed and rant about it on the internet.
I don’t care how long your wife was in labor, I don’t care what tore or was cut. DO NOT CARE. Please just let me do my work without gleaning these details. Take it to the break room, or the parking lot or far far away.
Spent a bit of time on the facebook today looking up terrible people from my past, it was semi-entertaining, too bad most of them have privacy settings which disable idle stocking. Any-who, it made me a bit sentimental and I’ve decided to troll around the internet in 2016 just in case I might be able to find a high school reunion for our class. I want to go so I can get sloppy drunk and tell everyone I invented post-its.